Went to an acupuncturist for the first time today -- fun! A little scary -- laughingly, though, I am more scared in these situations because I think I should be than because I actually am. Rationally I know that acupuncture is an ancient science, and dates back to the stone age, so I don't sweat it -- emotionally, I know that a goodly number of people (friends and family included) would be terrified by this and would never dream of having this done, so I get scared on their behalf. Osmotic fear? Borrowing trouble? Peer pressure? You decide.
It was relatively painless (proverbially and practically). First she asked me a variety of questions, not only about my reasons for seeking treatment (back/shoulder/neck pain and headaches) but about my general health (quality of sleep, breathing, and yes... bowel movements). We then moved on to the actual process. While I did have to unbutton my shorts and my tshirt was pulled up to my chest, I lay otherwise fully clothed, face-up on a massage table. After cleansing the target areas, she inserted a total of about 11-13 single-use needles all over my body. I had about 3 in each foot (top of foot), one in my lower abdomen, two just beneath my bra-line, one in my cleavage, one on either side of the base of my skull (behind the ears), and one or two in each wrist.
The needles are so fine (not hollow), many of them I did not even feel go in. Some I did, and only one hurt going in. Once they were all in, though, I really could not feel them -- I could feel something, mind you, and there's something odd psychologically about knowing you should not move because NEEDLES are in you, but otherwise it was a cake walk. I was left alone for a total of 15 minutes -- of the music options given me, I selected a massage tape (innocuous new-agey instrumental stuff), and did Lympatic Breathing* while I lay there. It was very relaxing overall, and I did get some almost instant headache relief.
Excitingly, my maladies also warranted some Cuppping. Not of my balls, which I sweated off** at work last night, but rather the Traditional Chinese Medicinal practice of Fire Cupping. I think a lot of the WES (White English-Speaking) world had not ever heard of cupping until Gywneth showed up about three years ago with a backful of hickeys -- I know I am guilty as charged. But it's a skosh older than that -- maybe not stone age, but I think 2500 years of history gives it a little creedence. To the left, you can see four of the locations of the cups. At the top-right of that image is the bottom of the 6th spot (more clearly seen in the image on below). 
Since I am an amazingly easy bruiser, I felt fairly confident that I'd be marked up at least this badly, if not worse. I kind of think I got off easy. :)
So, next Saturday I go back. More needles, maybe even in my face this time, and a conversation about herbal treatments. Right now, being me, I am so gung-ho on this -- any time I find something that works for me, I want that career. Pilates, chiropractic, massage therapy -- all of them made me feel awesome, so I began immediately fantasizing about a career in those fields. Now of course I am researching acupuncture after one visit -- sound at all like a girl in search of some meaning and direction? Yeah, I thought not. :)
* Okay, at the risk of sounding like a new-age nutcake, Lymphatic Breathing is done (as per Tony Robbins) by inhaling for one count of ____ seconds, holding your breath for four counts of _____, and exhaling for two counts of _____. Fill in the blank with whatever number you feel comfortable maintaining for ten reps, thrice daily. It helps cleanse the toxins out of your body. Or some shit like that.
** Yesterday was hot as hell at work, bringing to mind the charming colloquialism "Sweating my balls off." As I explained to my husband, since I do not have balls, it must be true -- I must have sweated them off. My husband... well, let's say he did not like that concept, and asked me to stop talking about my balls, non-existent or otherwise. I tell this story in part because it tickled me, and in part to help mitigate some of the new-ageyness of this post. You're welcome.
