We're adrift in the land of the brave

http://www.huffingtonpost.com/evan-handler/my-wife-is-an-immigrant_b_80978.html

Always knew I liked Evan Handler. Loved him on SITC and as Hurley's imaginary friend on LOST, as well as on the much-underappreciated STUDIO 60 ON THE SUNSET STRIP. But today I discovered his writings on the Huffington Post blogs. Makes me want to go out and get his books.

This post in particular echoes my own sentiments re: ethnicity vs nationality. Specifically: I am American. My mother is American, as was my father. My grandmothers and grandfathers on both sides were American. I am not sure about my paternal great-grandparents, but I do know that one of my maternal great-grandfathers was born outside the US -- I think most all of the rest were born in the US. So I am at least third generation American.

My ethnic heritage is another story. I'm what they used to call 'Heinz 57' -- 57 varieties. You name it, I've got one in my lineage somewhere, especially if it's a boring white European culture. I do not run around telling people I am Spanish, or Irish, or even Irish-American. Those terms refer to nationality, not ethnicity.

IMHO, if you are born in the US to parents also born in the US, you are an American. If you are born in the US to, say, Italian citizens, you can (if you so desire) call yourself Italian-American. More appropriately, though, I would reserve that designation for someone with dual citizenship. But none of the people in these examples are Italian. Italians are Italian. Evan Handler's wife is Italian. These are all matters of Nationality (with a capital N).

By contrast, Whoopi Goldberg says she's "black" and "American" but not "African-American" -- I may horribly misquote her, but I recall her quote being something along the lines of "I am not from Africa, I have not ever been to Africa, I am black." Avery Brooks raised his kids to be "brown" and is devoted to "the brown cultural expression." I feel safe saying Avery thinks he's an American too. "Black" and even Avery's "brown" are cultural/ethnic terms, not nationalities -- they refer to how one identifies culturally.

Problem is, we don't have enough colors defining other cultural backgrounds. "White" is boring, but so are most whites -- I think it applies well to people (like myself) of varying European ethnicities that don't really celebrate any of their cultural heritage beyond wearing a little green and getting drunk on St Patty's. But so far we only have white, black and brown -- that's only a drop in the cultural bucket. We need to start divvying up the other colors!

This would also give us a chance to "take back" colors that have been maligned for ethnic (yellow, red) or political (red, blue, pink) reasons. And if we manage to assign everyone a color, then wouldn't we all be 'colored'? Couldn't we all then just get along?

Oh, and everyone go buy a bidet.